One night as I lay not knowing why I wept I plunged my left hand into my chest and removed one of my ribs. This I fashioned in the image of a man, a man with long hair and wondrous kind sparkling eyes who told me he knew why I wept. “Little one, of course you have been crying, because you felt you were alone. But I am here now, and so you shall never need to feel alone or afraid again. I shall love you, protect you, cherish you. Only trust me–am I not a part of you? We belong to each other. Listen to me, love me, do as I say. We shall be so happy.”
I found him some clothes, for he was naked and I was ashamed of his nakedness. From the white sheets of my bedclothes I fashioned him a long, flowing robe. Long nights we sat together as I stitched intricate gold trimmings into the hem which touched his precious little feet. I had never been so happy.
When his robes were finished–how my fingers ached, striving for the beauty that would be worthy to touch his precious little feet!–he asked me to bring my closest friend over to meet him.
“Why, beloved?” I asked, “Are we not perfect only us, together as you said?”
“Are you not happy, now that I am here?”
“Oh yes, my beloved. Never so happy.”
“And isn’t it right that such joy be shared?”
I quickly agreed, yes of course it would be selfish not to share this perfect happiness. He told me to tell her that he had come from the mountains, that after a silence of a thousand years he came to me in a dream and then I rescued him, brought him to the world to share what he had found in his thousand year quest for perfect truth. I added my own flourish–that I had woken him with a chaste kiss! His true origin would be our little secret. I promised.
My friend came to seem him. Soon her friends came. My house was crowded with faces I had never seen, my food all eaten, many of my bowls and plates left dirty or broken. I was always cleaning now, never any time to see my Beloved except in the early hours of the morning, when even the bright eyed young men had been sent to bed.
I had never been so happy.
Soon my house was too small. I offered to again use my flesh, plunge my hands into my bones to build a hall worthy of Him. He said no, No–you must never use that power again or you should be terribly hurt, and I can’t let that happen to you.
Instead we gathered from each true devotee, all of our strong pillars, two of their back molars with which we built the foundation of the hall.
When the foundation was built, investors saw that our vision would become real due to Beloved’s Grace, and they flocked to help. Only this time, they did not give teeth or bones or even sweat–they gave coins.
Beloved said, “They are not as strong as you, my dear. They are weak and so they give money.”
“Beloved, if they are weak as you say, why do you spend so much of your time with them and not with us?”
“Because they are weak they need me more, and I must go where I am needed.”
The hall was finished! Or so they said–the contractors had stolen the insulation from inside the walls, so it was very cold in there. Often others complained of the cold. I did not care one bit for the cold, let the cold do to me as it may. When I could sit in an ocean of kindred gazing at Him as He sat on the throne we made for Him, I had never been so happy.
I am old now. I live in one of our Centers, and I work cleaning up after our dear guests–still cleaning after all these years! Beloved says I have a gift for housekeeping. I love making everything nice and cozy for the young families who come Home for courses, it makes me so happy. When Beloved came to teach last summer, He smiled right at me! I knew in my heart He was as happy as I was to be together again after all this time, even for a moment. But then the minders hurried Him along to teach the others– it was a very important course, one He says will stop this horrible war if we practice well and faithfully. I pray for that with all my heart– I know He will lead us to an era of peace, love and unity. He has come to us to show us the way. I may not live to see it, but it will be my legacy to all my grand nieces and nephews. We’ve never met–my sister and I lost touch many years ago–but I keep their pictures on my nightstand and I pray to Beloved for them every day and I know they will see that perfect world Beloved is bringing for them and their children, and their children’s children. They will be so happy.
The last time Beloved spoke to me was three years ago today. He hugged me–oh, the Bliss!–and then he smiled and said, “Remember? Our little secret!” and put his finger to his lips in a gesture of Silence. I couldn’t remember any secret, and I felt so stupid until I realized he must have meant the Silence that I have found in his care, the knowledge that has given meaning to my life where there was none, the precious secret he shared with me and our Family and that we will now share with the whole world. We all have that truth within us, Beloved says, we all have that power– I thank Beloved every day that He came into my life to help me find mine.